In today’s world of cut throat competition, especially in a populous state like India hard work, ambitiousness aren’t just words but are the daily stories of a common (read: from general quota) man. And what separates the ordinary hard workers from the genuinely laborious students is their dogged adherence. When the world doses off, lights turn off, serenity dispels the chaos and desires burn like they are more to an individual than the heart beat and the incessant respiration, that’s when champions are made.

An individual arises from his/her own nothingness and submerges in the same day in and day out to beat all odds and secure meritorious ranks, qualifications and promotions in myriad spheres. Every single time (s)he cracks an entrance exam, or breaks another record and shines in the periphery of the eye it seems to me that they are trying to tell us that they burnt themselves to appear to be illuminated under the dark tragic backdrop. Hence, they deserve true recognition and utmost respect.

But we still live in a society where if a 22 year old lass confronts to her father that she cleared the entrance test to get admitted in a foreign college(say with a total expenditure of Rs 25 lakhs), then the poor girl receives a negation in the name of financial weakness of her parents. The same girl is married off, the very next month with the parents shelling out at least Rs 30 lakhs for the big fat wedding.
A woman is often limited by our society in the name of ‘realism’ to sew her dreams shut by stuffing all her aspirations in a cushion cover aka her soul. Sports aren’t meant for her, mechanics and aerodynamics can’t be her forte, speed and alcohol shouldn’t give her the adrenaline rush, and definitely driving and proficient decision making can’t be her strength. So she is wedlocked by her parents as riddance, or we can say that the onus now switches over from them to her husband. If she’s really eager to work after marriage, then she can do so for another 2-3 years till the time she bears her own kids and grooms them after (mostly) quitting from the job. She can’t afford to soil her saree during a stroll down the lane with her in-laws or laze around in oversized shirts because she always should be presentable. Can she?

So basically, it all starts with a girl who was dying to finish high school to start college and start living fully. When she joined college, she was dying to finish college and start working and living fully. When she was working, she was dying to get married and start living fully. When she was raising her little ones, she was dying to send them to school and return to work and start living fully. And then she was dying to retire from the job and live post retirement fully. And then she was dying, and she realized that she forgot to live.

A young 21 year old lad isn’t better off either. He has been brought up under the anecdotes which encourages him to be unaccountable to his very own mother after growing up to a certain age, take major decisions of the house and turn a ‘father’ to his mother when he starts earning a livelihood. He can’t afford water droplets drenching his eyes and rolling down the cheeks when the going gets tough. He shouldn’t supposedly express himself too much and should remain inhibited and perennially strong. After all, he solely has to handle his wife and kids as if they’re slaves and he the master. And if you’re the one who’s thinking to break the jinx by sharing the responsibilities with your wife then just be prepared to be mocked at.

You might be wondering that why am I not talking about the band baaja baraat, or maybe shaadi ka laddoo as so is the feeling that the title offers. But I wanted to bring into limelight that why are we just groomed in the society to just get married off one day? Can’t there be more things than being the ideal bride or groom in the society? And, may the Lord and God bless you with enough valor to overcome disgrace if you’re thinking to remain a bachelor or a spinster forever! Period.


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